Reflections on the friends I have, and may never meet...

Tonight I looked out of our windows and saw in the darkness of 2:00 in the morning a house on the hill with lights on- and was flooded with emotions.  Rewind six years ago and Jay and I had just moved in together and we would often take the fur kids on hikes.  There was this one hill way atop that had this beautiful view, and a gorgeous house atop it. We sat- overlooking the house on the hill and I looked around at my "family"- Jay, my then boyfriend- Luka, our dog, Mirage - our second dog, and Austin- our cat.  I never met the people who lived there- I don't know if they were old or young- if they had just moved in or lived there 20 years or more.  I wondered about them, what they looked like, what their family was like...Six years later and I still have never met them; I don't know if I will ever meet them, or if our paths have crossed, will cross, or may never cross.  Isn't that such a strange concept?  This happens millions a times a day-throughout our entire lives- we are just going by, living our lives while people are living their own lives.  Their joys and celebrations, their hear breaks and sorrows, their loves and losses- we are all just living.

My life is so different now from that first hike.  Jay proposed- Danica my stepdaughter moved in, Mila - my second stepdaughter would come to visit, and since then -we have had not one but two babies- Brooklyn and Cali.  We  have since lost two of our fur kids.  Sadly Mirage was in a hit and run  on a Christmas Eve last year- the  saddest christmas of my life- but four sweet days later my gorgeous baby Cali was born- and filled my darkest hour with some light.  Austin, our cat got sick, he rapidly began losing weight and getting what appeared to be cancer according to one of the vets.  Towards the end he did not leave my side- he even ate and drank which game me hope and then one day- he meowed to go out and has  never returned.  I read animals do this when it's their time- my heart breaks, but without closure of a final goodbye it does not feel real.  I often think I see him in the shadows of the night, only to realize it's not. So odd how I can spend 6-10 years so intimately, working from home, seeing them every day, sleeping with them, thinking of them as my "kids"... and then one day, just like that, they're gone, and my family as I knew it just six short years ago is so different in such a short period of time.

I wonder how those people who live in that houses life might have changed- if at all.  Do they ever look up at our house and lights in the night and wonder the same thing?

This area, unlike NYC and RTP is not transient.  More often than not the people I meet were born here, have grown old here and will most likely die here.  Very few travel outside these areas and even less have plans of moving.  Jay and I are nomads, Rolling Stones.  Between the two of us we have moved 20 times, multiple statues and even countries.  Although I am not shy at making friends, (I always say a stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet")  I often am reserved to really truly get close to anyone - - sort of unconscious affect to avoid the pain of losing friendships after I inevitably move as I always have.

I am thankful to social media - especially facebooked for this reason.  So many people get to participate and stay involved in our lives and vice versa- no matter where we live.

On trips -Jay and I have been to 75 countries and countless cities and towns- we often meet people through our adventures.  Jay calls these encounters- a reason, a season or a lifetime.  You never know how the person you meet- albeit a fleeting period of time in the scheme of your life will impact the rest of your entire life... or, perhaps just a flickering shadow in the memories of your life.  

Our most recent example would be our newest friend -Wayne; we met on the ferry from Ireland to Liverpool.  He only takes that ferry twice a year- we happened to be on one of those two voyages.  Out of thousands of people aboard, we happend to sit next  each other.  Rather then remain silent- he started a conversation about our accents and  inquired where we were from.  As an Irish fellow, he happened to live in the states when he was 16.  We ended up chatting for the entire three hour voyage- even while Jay fell asleep in between us.  I had plans of playing matchmaker with this delightful, polite single young man with the adorable accent to one of my single friends (you know who you are). He even helped me to entertain (and wrangle) some of the mischievous Irish, and UK baby/toddler girls who wandered around and became friends with Brooklyn and Cali to prevent them from waking Jay up while taking selfies while he slept with his IPAD and giggling.  We became friends- and then FB friends- -and now somebody who I might never have seen again will forever be our friends.

I am also reminded of Narayan, our tour guide in Nepal- one of our honeymoon destinations.   We spent three days with him and we loved it there, and being in his knowledgeable, warm and inviting company... we promised if we ever went back to scale Mt. Everest or simply eat the delicious local cuisine called MoMos-  it would be with him.  Imagine a few years later how devastated I was when the earthquake hit Nepal- and how relieved I was when he marked his family safe on FB (I would have always wondered and worried had we lost touch).

Perhaps my biggest reminder is my South African friend "Dad Deon"- who was my tour guide in SA the month before I met Jay.  During that trip- My  grandmother passed away -and I got extremely sick.  Deon was more of a dad to me then my real dad ever was.  He cared for me, consoled me, took me to the doctors and insured I felt loved and taken care of....even when I was all the way around the world, without my closest family or friends, I was blessed to have my dear friend Jared- as well as the new friends I made.   I of course became FB friends with him and his beautiful wife Vinessa and family and think of them all often- all the way on the other side of the world- but just a click away thanks to Facebook.  We are like tech savvy new version of pen pals.

Heck I even met my sister and brother  thanks to  facebook - but that deserves its own blog.  :)

Sure, there are many more people I have met that I have not connected with and may never see again.      Times like this, when I am feeing melancholy and thoughtful I think of each of them.  I wish them health and happiness and hope that one day, someday our paths might cross again.  I am thankful for the evolution of technology-  and that people I meet along the way I can connect with and share in this crazy journey we call life.  There are so many people I have only met a few times but our lives have become interwoven and they have truly earned a place in my heart (and on my newsfeed).

I am not sure if we will grow old here, or move in a few months.  I don't know who will enter my life, or who will leave it... or who will cross my path along the way.  I do not know when the first time I meet someone if that is the last- or the beginning of a lifelong friendship... but I hope it is.  I hope to know you, I hope that my journey is filled with amazing people like the ones I have been blessed to know so far.  I don't know where my destination will take me, or any of us... but I am excited for the journey (and to have YOU in my life...be it a reason, a season, or my lifetime).

A Tribute to my Mom and Our Mediterranean Cruise

My mom is my hero.  She is AMAZING.  She is one of six children, and grew up in poor 1st generation

 Immigrant family in Brooklyn NY.  My grandmother, a loving, church going, sweet heart of a woman got sick.  My grandfather- not such a nice guy - decided to put his children in an orphanage rather then take care

of them.  The oldest ran away, second went with a friend, and the rest stuck together as best they could.  My great aunt upon finding out, quit her job and took them out of the home, and raised them with her husband until my grandmother got better. My aunt lived on a farm in Long Island and couldn't have children- so she always said Babci (Grandma in Polish) had enough kids for them to share.  She had warm dinners, play time, church time, study time, and best of all plenty of love.

 Many of these qualities became the core foundation in our very family as well.  My mom was forced to grow up at a very young age, and be a rock for her family, her mother, and eventually me...

When my grandmother got better she moved the kids back to Brooklyn.  I always wondered what would have happened if they stayed in farm life (funny to think of Long Island a huge metro suberb of NYC as a farm- but those were the times).  Nevertheless my mom was 13 when she met my father who was 16.  He had troubles, and although she loved him and thought she could help him- he became abusive.  My mom did not want me to grow up in that environment and got divorced and we moved back to Brooklyn where she raised me by herself as a single mom since I was 8 months old.  I don't say this with shame, but with pride that she had enough courage and faith to leave a terrible situation to give us both a better life. 
 I was the first in my family to attend and graduate from College. My mom worked for the Board of Education for 24 years helping children from Pre K- HS with drug prevention, violence prevention, gang prevention etc.  Recently a student of hers became a FB friend... he was a "bad kid" who always was in trouble.  My mom loved him the most.  She helped him, listened to him, and redirected him.  He now serves in the US Military and thanked my mom.  He said it was because of people like her he is where he is today, selflessly defending our country.  Just one example of the thousands of lives my mom has touched. 

  My mom moved to NC and has continued as she calls it, "doing God's Work" helping the elderly- especially her favorite- Mildred who is 98.  My mom adores her, and the feeling is more than mutual.  My mom although she no longer takes care of Mildred still visits her buddy.  My mom has always sacrificed for everyone, putting herself last.  Her needs, wants, and desires have been put on hold so she can help everyone else around her. 

My mom has longed dreamed of going to Greece.  She talks about it all the time, like some far away dream that one day... someday might get realized. 

Well for those of you who follow my story, you know I have been blessed to travel to 60 countries now, most of which with my darling Husband Jay... but the first trip I ever took out of the country was with my mom and grandma when I was 13 on a cruise - 7 days at Sea and then off to Bermuda!  It was a magical land of turquoise blue water, and I longed for more.  At  Sweet 16-  My mom asked me what do you want for your birthday?  A party?  A car (even if she couldn't afford it... it really wasn't necessary since I was NYC kid).  "No "I said, "I want to go somewhere...".  "Okay" she said without hesitation- "Where?".  Italy! I replied,  Are you nuts she said?  Well maybe, but why not.  It was my 16th, my mom's 40th and my grandmother's 65th Birthday- and I was born longing to travel the world.  Especially our home country!  So- we went! It was the trip of the lifetime, and changed my life!  I cried when I left... and I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life exploring far away lands, eating foreign food, listening to exotic new languages and music, and immersing myself in "strange" and wonderful cultures. 

Well, I am super excited to finally,after all these years repeat that trip of 3 generations- but this time my mom is Grandma and Brooklyn will once again go Globe Trotting and have nothing but pictures to remember ;).  I am taking my mom on her dream trip and then some!

We are starting in a surprise destination, and then heading to Barcelona, Spain to being a Mediterranean Cruise!

 Indeed this will be a dream vacation for all of us :)

 

Sat, 08/08/15	Barcelona, Spain View general port information Muelle Adosado Puerto De Barcelona Barcelona, Spain Www.Apb.Es Check In 1:00pm-5:30pm see Travel Summary For progressive Check In Times	– 7:00pm
Sun, 08/09/15	Marseille (provence), France	7:00am – 5:00pm
Mon, 08/10/15	Genoa, Italy (for Milan)	7:00am – 6:00pm
Tue, 08/11/15	Florence/Pisa (livorno), Italy	7:00am – 7:00pm
Wed, 08/12/15	At Sea
Thu, 08/13/15	Valletta, Malta	7:00am – 4:00pm
Fri, 08/14/15	Sicily (palermo), Italy	7:00am – 2:00pm
Sat, 08/15/15	Rome (civitavecchia), Italy See Travel Summary For progressive Check In Times	5:00am – 6:00pm
Sun, 08/16/15	Naples, Italy (for Capri & Pompeii)	7:00am – 6:00pm
Mon, 08/17/15	At Sea
Tue, 08/18/15	Crete (heraklion), Greece	9:00am – 6:00pm
Wed, 08/19/15	Rhodes, Greece	8:00am – 5:00pm
Thu, 08/20/15	Kusadasi, Turkey (for Ephesus)	8:00am – 5:00pm
Fri, 08/21/15	Santorini, Greece Tender Required wheelchair Access Limited	7:00am – 6:00pm
Sat, 08/22/15	Athens (piraeus), Greece View general port information	4:00am

 Many places I have never been to myself!  It will be my first time in France, Malta, Turkey, Greece and Sicily (where my ancestors truly are from!).  I am so excited to have this experience with my wonderful and deserving mom... although I will miss my amazing husband as this is the longest I would have been away from him since we got married.  You know what they say- absence makes the heart grow fonder (as if that is even possible for Jay and I :)).

  I cannot wait to share the food, pictures, and best of all cherished memories with my mom and Schmooberry (aka Brooklyn).  It willl be an exciting journey and becomes more real the closer we get.  Time to pick excursions and prepare for all the fun!  Stay tuned for pics and stories :)  Also, if you have been to any of the destinations please comment on any and all "must sees" :) Thanks!

Pre Honeymoon Happiness- Finding Nemo

Countdown to Pre-Honey Moon 2 weeks to the day!!! Woo Woo.  As you all might know Jay McBain and I have tons of things in common, but TOPS on our list is the fact that he and I are crazy Travelers (in fact the night we met I had just got back from Beautiful South Africa and he was about to leave for SA!).  We go fast, hard, and care more about food, culture and experience than thread count on bed linens. We usually average 7 countries in about 10 days...(the perfect amount of time for a whirlwind trip for insomniac work-a-holics).  Someday we plan on going back  and spending a good amount of time in each of our favorites!










Thus far he has been to 56 countries and I have been to 46 (but he's older... just sayin').  In our first two years we have been to 23 countries together!!! So I am most excited that we have decided to use frequent flyer miles (thank you Wedding Credit Card) to keep our "Travel The World" every 6 months voyage in action.  We will be voyaging down Under to Australia and New Zealand (I desperately tried to include Fiji or Papa New Guinea- but there are not enough hours in the day, or miles to spend this go round! haha).  We usually choose capital cities, and skip tropical paradises (ie Bangkok vs Phuket) but this time I smuggled in a beautiful chance for a little piece of Paradise (playing both the Honeymoon and Valentine's Day Card! ;)).

So on our mission through Melbourne, Sydney, Brisbane, Gold Coast, Auckland... I have snuck in a delightful trip to paradise!  Much of which is still a surprise to my love (girls's gotta have her secrets).  We will be headed to the Whitsundays- Hamilton Island!!! Snorkeling in one of the 7th Wonders of the World- the Great Barrier Reef (one of my dreams come true- and I am on a quest to find Nemo and all his friends), frolicking in the crystal white Sands of Whitehaven (one of the top 10 beaches in the World), Sailing, Snorkeling, Eating, Drinking and plain ol' relaxing.  It will be a much needed break from "Life" Work, School, Wedding Planning, and the COLD (and even a vacation from our normal fast paced Vacations walking approximately 30 miles a day- FACT Jakarta Indonesia - My FitBit can attest).

Here is a glimmer of paradise.  This go round I want to blog about every country we have been to- to treasure every memory and share it with those we love.  I can't wait to continue to journey the World with you my LOVE today- and always!!!!

Click for a Sneak Peek of PARADISE!